FvF 5: The Empire Strikes Back-ish

Hello Frantic Talks readers and welcome to Frantic vs Freakshow! In this series we have taken the TEW game (which is used in our Chronicles of AWE series) and created a roster for Frantic Talks Wrestling which include not only some Attitude Era WWE wrestlers but also some modern day names you’ll probably recognize. Let’s jump right in!

Frantic’s Cards

Last time we saw Jervis crowned FTW Television Champion, the Kings of the Afterlife finally overcome the Lucha Masters, and Shinsuke Nakamura was buried alive. What’s in store next? Let’s find out!

FTW Showdown: Week 17

The show is at the Eagles Club in front of 88 people.

Before the show Matt Hardy found a karaoke machine and put on a pre-show competition. His medley of power-ballads apparently stole the show.

The show opens with Chris Raeber who makes his way out to the ring. He’s slow, limping, and has a black eye. “Monday at Use Your Illusion I was attacked by Marty Scurll after giving the belt to Jervis Cottonbelly when Scurll broke the rules I set in line for him. I am here to inform you that he has been suspended for the next month for attacking me. Mr. Scurll, as well as the rest of the FTW World, needs to know this business runs on respect and fairness, not intimidation.”

Facade is taking on Jason Gory in singles action for the first match of the night to see who will get a shot at the Television title. A well-fought bout that ends with Gory winning via a Swanton Bomb.

Cody and Kenny Omega with Frantic are seen backstage. Frantic starts, “Alright guys I’m glad we’ve bonded here. Cody I am happy you took me up on my offer. So we need to come up with a plan to take down the-” Cody then interrupts, “Yeah thanks for the offer. Kenny we need to come up with a plan to take down the Crane Occult. They’ve been giving you grief and it’s about time we put an end to it.” They walk away and leave Frantic who looks very upset.

We see two hooded figures backstage in a dimly lit room both holding chalices. They each take their hoods down to reveal Freakshow and Jeremiah Crane. Freakshow says, “After our loss at Use Your Illusion it has become clear to me that we have not offered our every whim to the Great One. As we drink these chalices of blood we must repent for our foolish ways.” As they start drinking Jervis, Sami Zayn, and Johnny Gargano walk in. They look at each other, puzzled, and slowly back out of the room.

The main event has the Young Bucks taking on the Kings of the Afterlife. In a very entertaining match the Kings of the Afterlife are able to come away victorious. While they’re celebrating the lights go out, a bell gongs, and the lights come back on to reveal The Undertaker at the top of the entrance ramp. “Rey. Fenix. You claim to be Kings of the Afterlife. You know nothing of the world of the dead. End this facade now, or you will feel the true wrath of the dead.”

This show got us a C rating.

FTW Showdown: Week 18

The show is at Bill Aker Baseball Complex in front of 81 people.

The Rock is in the ring to start us off. “The People’s champ is trying to stay humble, but he can’t help but feel like one tough son of a bitch when he lays the Smackdown on every challenger. The same goes for the winner of the #1 contender’s match tonight between Pentagon Dark and Jeff Hardy. Those two jabronis won’t be able to handle the most electrifying man in sports entertainment. So enjoy your win tonight because this belt ain’t going nowhere.”

The first match of the night has Cody and Kenny Omega taking on Sami Zayn and Johnny Gargano. Before the match begins Freakshow and Crane make their way to the ring. Freakshow grabs a microphone, “The Great One needs his followers to prove his worthiness. Sami and Johnny – you both have pledged allegiance to the Great One. A sacrifice is needed.” Sami and Johnny look at each other and both throw their hands up wanting nothing to do with Freakshow’s request. “One of you needs to lay down and lose this match. Sacrifice your selfishness for the greater good!” Johnny shakes his head and walks out. Sami doesn’t walk away but refuses to lay down. “Fine! Crane! Make a good example for the followers!” Crane lays down and Omega happily agrees to pin him. The referee, Larry Peace, is confused and Freakshow screams at him “START COUNTING!” This startles Peace who counts to 3 quickly.

Our actual first match sees Jervis defending his title against Jason Gory. A well-fought match that has Jervis winning by chaining a Rock-A-Bye Back Drop into a Downtown Lock for the win to defend his title.

The Kings of the Afterlife are taking on the Irish Airborne next. Rey and Fenix make their way out to the ring. Rey grabs a mic, “I don’t know what nonsense the Undertaker was spouting last week, but the Kings of the Afterlife aren’t going anywhere. We’re going to continue winning and no light-shows or empty threats are going to intimidate us.” The Irish Airborne make their way out to the ring and the match begins. Both teams get in some great offense and the match ends with a combo 619 into a Fenix driver for the 3-count.

The Main event sees Jeff Hardy taking on Pentagon Dark to see who will be facing The Rock for the Power Championship. Speaking of The Rock, he’s on special guest commentary. A hard-fought match with great wrestling from both sides the ends with Pentagon Dark gets a low-blow and delivers the Pentagon Driver. Pentagon Dark looks at the Rock and signals Cero Miedo at The Rock.

The show got us a B- rating.

FTW Showdown: Week 19

Jake Crist was brought before wrestler’s court due to his failure to shake another worker’s hand upon arrival. He was ordered by judge Kane to buy everyone a round of drinks after the show.

The show is at Scott Part Baseball Complex in front of 90 people.

The show opens with a tag match between the Young Bucks and the team of Johnny Gargano and Television Champion Jervis Cottonbelly. Midway through the match Marty Scurll makes his way through the crowd and into the ring. He attacks the ref from behind and then Jervis with his Umbrella. Security chases Scurll out of the ring and backstage. This sets up an easy pinfall win for the Young Bucks.

Backstage we see the Fearless in what appears to be some sort of meeting. Frantic says, “We finally have the upper hand gentleman. The glory I once promised is finally-” he’s interrupted by Cody. “Frantic I’ll take it from here. Kenny and I are going to run FTW and bring it to glory. Don’t worry, you’ll have your chance to shine. Just let us handle it for now.” They leave and the rest of the Fearless look confused.

We then are treated to a dark purple room with a hooded figure reading from a book on a pedestal. The camera pans to reveal The Undertaker. A dark figure is shown at the entrance to the room. Undertaker says, “Bring him to me.”

Freakshow is on camera backstage. “Our sacrifices to the Great One prove our worthiness in his eyes. However, many of our so-called followers seem to not understand what his stands for. At Showdown at the Swamp, our leader Jeremiah Crane will battle Cody and Kenny Omega in a handicap match. He will sacrifice his well-being against two formidable foes as an example to the doubtful followers.”

Cody is taking on Rey Mysterio in singles action. The match gets going quickly with hard-hitting action and good wrestling from each contender. Rey Mysterio goes for a Frog Splash but Cody moves out of the way at the last minute. Both men are down on the apron when the lights turn red. Kane rips through the bottom of the ring and drags a weakened Rey Mysterio through the ring. The match ends in a no-contest and a B rating.

The Main Event sees The Rock defending his title against Pentagon Dark. Part-way through the match Eddie Guerrero makes his way down to the ring and is lingering on the outside apron. He keeps distracting The Rock, grabbing his ankle when he is near the ropes, sometimes tripping him in the process. This happens when the Rock goes for the People’s Elbow. The Rock doesn’t fall, however he slides to the outside of the ring and chases Eddie off. He gets back in only to get hit by a Pentagon Driver. Pentagon then signals for Cero Miedo. He sets The Rock up for the Sacrifice but The Rock is able to overpower Pentagon. A few moments later The Rock hits the Rock Bottom and pins Pentagon for the 3-count for a B+ rating.

The show got us a B rating.

FTW Showdown: Week 20

The go-home show to Showdown at the Swamp is at Coaches Stadium in front of 92 people.

The show starts with Jervis in Chris Raeber’s office. “Good sir, I fear for my safety and wish to not wrestle in my match tonight. That neerdowell with an umbrella is psychotic.” Chris responds, “I understand your concern Jervis. We’ve both suffered our fair share of pain from him. How he was able to get back into the arena while suspended is beyond me. I can tell you that I’ve made sure the best security is on-hand for tonight’s show and you should not fear for your match.”

The Irish Airborne are taking on Sanity (Alexander Wolfe and Eric Young) in tag team action for our first match of the night. The match ends when The Irish Airborne hit the Killing Spree on Alexander Wolfe for the 3-count.

The Rock makes his way out to the ring. “Last week I defeated that jabroni Pentagon Dark after his lackey Guerrero tried to give him the upper hand.” Just then Eddie’s music plays and he appears at the top of the entrance ramp. “No you got it all wrong ese. Pentagon was just testing the waters for me. I wanted to see just how hard it’d be to take you down.” The Rock responds, “Take me down? The Rock doesn’t simply go down after his foot gets tickled by a roody-poo candy-ass! You hear me, ‘ese’?” Eddie laughs. “Tell you what Eddie, The Rock ain’t afraid of you. He ain’t afraid of the 5-sided jabroni you call your teammate. He ain’t afraid to defend his Power Championship against you. And he most certainly is not afraid to lay the smackdown on your candy-ass at Showdown at the Swamp if you smell what The Rock is cooking!” This segment got an A+.

Up next is Television Champion Jervis Cottonbelly taking on Nick Jackson in non-title singles action. A well-fought bout that features minor interference from Matt Jackson at ringside. Larry Peace sends Matt backstage in order to keep the peace. The match resumes but only for a few moments when Marty Scurll runs through the crowd. He gets into the ring but Jervis is much more aware and a staredown ensues, followed by a brawl. When Jerivs appears to have the upper hand Matt Jackson makes his way down to the ring and hits Jervis with a chair. The Young Bucks grab the Television title and give it to Scurll who holds it over an unconscious Jervis. This match got a B-.

Scurll grabs a mic and says, “Raeber you are too stupid for your own good. I’ll admit the security you had was hard to over power. That’s why enlisted the help of two good friends to get me in here tonight. I may be suspended but my influence knows no artificial bounds. At Showdown at the Swamp you will lift my suspension if the Young Bucks can defeat Jervis in a match.” Raeber appears at the entrance and says, “You really think it’s that easy? Seeing as how I cannot afford to pay for all the security guards’ medical bills from your beatings, you can have your match. However, Jervis will get to pick his teammate, and if they win they all three of you are fired from FTW!”

Fenix makes his way down to the ring. “Kane kidnapped my friend Rey Mysterio as you all saw last week. I’m getting tired of the games he and his brother are playing. Kane! Get your ass down here and fight me. If I win you have to free Rey!” The lights go dark, Kane’s music starts, pyrotechnics go apeshit, and out walks Kane!

A match ensues between the two and is a well-fought match. Fenix and Kane both get in some great hits along with equally impressive counters to each other’s finishers. As the match is nearing its end both wrestlers are extremely fatigued. Fenix delivers a Corkscrew Senton bomb to Kane which renders both men unconscious on the mat. After a moment, Kane sits up, the lights go dark, and a bell gongs a few times. The lights come back on to reveal an unconscious Rey Mysterio in the ring. This match got a B-.

The show got us a C+ rating.

FTW Showdown at the Swamp

Showdown at the Swamp is brought to you by Malibu Al’s Car Emporium. Remember: station wagons are the cars of the future. The show is at the Eagles Club in front of 57 people.

The show opens with the Young Bucks making their way to the ring. Jervis then comes out with a microphone. “Fowl gentlemen in the ring, I give my most sincere condolences for both the pain that will be inflicted upon you and the loss of your employment. My partner for tonight is another masked avenger – the eccentric El Generico!” A masked man resembling the likes of Sami Zayn (music included) appears and joins Jervis at the entrance. They make their way down to the ring and the match begins!

The match has great wrestling from each contender with the Young Bucks doing their typical high-flying moves while Jervis and Generico rely more on wrestling and chaining moves together. The clash of styles still works well as the crowd enjoys the match. Jervis and Generico get the upper hand but then Marty Scurll’s music plays. They both turn their attention to the entrance way, referee included, and they both get low-blowed by the Young Bucks. They get rolled up and the ref doesn’t see the handful of tights both men grabbed and the Young Bucks win.

Rey Mysterio makes his way out to the ring. “It would appear The Undertaker was just using me to get to Fenix. While I was being held captive he told me he needed to harness the power of the Kings of the Afterlife. I don’t know what he is planning, but Fenix is my friend, and I want him set free.” Undertaker appears on the titantron, “You can have your friend but you’ll have to come get him. He’s right here.” The camera pans to show Fenix tied up in a chair. Rey runs backstage. This segment got an A+.

The camera follows Rey backstage as he’s asking people where Undertaker is. Eventually he finds a red feather on the ground, then another, and follows them to the boiler room where he finds Fenix. Undertaker and Kane attack him from behind and a boiler room brawl ensues. Rey is getting hit hard but is able to get free long enough to free Fenix. The brawl continues and both Undertaker and Fenix get split open. Rey and Fenix manage to scramble out of the boiler room and lock the door, trapping Kane and Undertaker inside. This match got a B-.

Crane Occult leader Jeremiah Crane is taking on United States Champion Kenny Omega and Cody of the Fearless in a handicap match. Crane fights well but the two skilled fighters prove too much for Crane and they win easily. As Omega and Cody make their way up the ramp Freakshow gets in the ring with two chalices and hands one to Crane. They get on their knees, drink what appears to be blood from the chalices, and extend their arms into the air. The lights go out and come back on shortly after. They are nowhere to be seen. Omega and Cody look very confused. This match and segment got a B-.

The main event features The Rock defending his Power Championship against Eddie Guerrero. This is an impressive bout between both men the gets the crowd extremely hyped. Eddie is able to trick the Rock into knocking out the ref, followed by immediately low-blowing him. Eddie gets outside the ring, grabs the belt, climbs to the top turnbuckle, and delivers a frog splash with the belt as the ‘cushion’ to the impact. He shakes the nearby referee awake and gets the 3-count to become the new FTW Power Champion! This match got a B+.

The show got us a B rating.

Let’s see how Freakshow did!

Freakshow’s Cards

Last time we saw all three titles change hands. We also saw Omega Man X unmasked to be Kenny Omega. What repercussions will this have since he was fired? We find out now!

FTW Showdown: Week 17

This week we are live from the Bolding Stadium in front of a sell out crowd of 500 people. The show opens up with CEO Chris Raaber coming out to the ring. “At Use Your Illusion Omega Man X’s real identity was revealed to be Kenny Omega. As we all know Kenny Omega lost a Loser Leaves Town match back at Clash of Champions in September. I’ve been thinking about how to handle this, and I’ve decided to hire you back. Seeing as how you’re under my employment now I’m suspending you until Showdown at the Swamp. Then you will be taking on Jeremiah Crane, Rey Mysterio Jr and The Undertaker in a 3-on-1 handicap match.” This segment got a B+.

Next up we have the Broken Hardys vs Beer Money Inc. Before the match really got started Broken Matt and Brother Nero beat down Beer Money with chairs and Matt takes the mic. “OUTSIDERS!! You want to come into our domain, and take our titles? We want a rematch, and we shall show you why the seven deities chose us!” This segment got an A.

Our main event sees Fenix vs Facade. This match is very exciting and faced paced with Facade ultimately getting the win after locking in the Dread-Lock forcing Fenix to tap out. This match got a B.

This show overall got an A- rating.

FTW Showdown: Week 18

We come to you live from the Dignity Health Event Center in front of another sell out crowd of 500 people. We open up with Shinsuke Nakamura in the ring. Mic in hand. “Johnny Gargano, you beat me for the FTW Heavyweight Championship. You beat me using underhanded tactics. I gave you chance after chance, because you’re a great wrestler. I see now though it was just a ploy. Come Showdown at the Swamp I want my rematch  If you’re really Johnny Wrestling you can beat me without all that underhanded bullshit.” This segment an A.

We go to the back for an interview with Fenix when the screen cuts to static, and a voice line plays, “The following announcement has been pain for by The Outsiders.” The screen goes black and white then cuts to Scott Hall and Kevin Nash outside a bar with a handcam. Scott Hall holds the camera up to his face and says, “Matt, Brother Nero,” said mockingly, “you want to threaten us with all your seven deity talk, chico. Well the Bad Guy and Big Sexy are about to show you why we don’t need cheap threats.” Hall calls someone over. “Here kid, hold this camera.” They bust in the bar and look around until the finally see an older man sitting at the bar. They jump him from behind and put the boots to him. The man behind the camera is egging them on. Kevin Nash picks him up and Jackknife powerbombs him on the bar top, and looks at the camera and says, “Hardy Boys, we can find you no matter where you hide.” The man behind the camera turns the camera on himself. It turns out to be Syxx (X-Pac). “Say hi to Dad, Hardy Boys.” He zooms in on the old man. The screen once again goes black and a voice line plays, “The preceding announcement has been paid for by The Outsiders.” This segment got an A.

The main event sees The Rock utterly destroy the Bambi Killer to send the crowd home happy. This match got a B-.

Overall the show got an A-.

FTW Showdown: Week 19

Tonight we come to you live from the North West in front of 552 people. The show opens up with The Scythe in the ring. Undertaker has the mic. “Kenny Omega, at Use Your Illusion I shattered your weak mind, and took your title. You were supposed to be gone forever, but yet just like a lost puppy you find your way back. Come Showdown at the Swamp we will put you six feet under.” This segment got an A.

Next we are live from the hospital parking lot with Broken Matt and Brother Nero. Matt looks into the camera and says, “Hall; Nash: you two are the scum of the Earth going after our Dad like that. Come Showdown at the Swamp you’re going to feel the wrath of the Hardys. You won’t be facing Broken Matt and Brother Nero. You’ll be facing Matt and Jeff Hardy. If that drowned rat looking Syxx tries to put his nose in our business we will put all three of you in the hospital.” This segment got a B+.

The main event sees Johnny Gargano taking on James Storm. Gargano wrestles circles around Storm, and starts playing to the crowd. This allows James Storm to make a comeback and beat down Johnny Gargano. Just as James Storm turns his back for a moment Gargano pulls something out of his tights, and puts it in his hand. Gargano gets up and as Storm turns around he gets slugged in the face. Quarters fly everywhere, and Gargano pins him for the 1-2-3. This match got an A.

Overall the show got an A.

FTW Showdown: Week 20

Before the show it was brought to my attention that Shinsuke Nakamura and James Storm have formed a friendship over their mutual love of anime.

The go home edition of Showdown comes to you live from the Bill Aker Baseball Complex in front of a sold out crowd of 500 people. The show starts with Johnny Gargano in the ring. “Shinsuke Nakamura… I worked my way up the ladder earning the respect of the fans, but you know what none of that means shit without this title around my waist. Yeah I cheated to win, but I didn’t get caught. That’s what matters, and come Showdown at the Swamp I’m going to beat your ass again.” This segment got a B-.

Next up The Outsiders & Syxx come out to the ring through the crowd. Scott Hall grabs a mic and say, “Hey yo, Hardys we heard you last week go on with your empty threats. Didn’t you two learn last time? The Outsiders take action and we don’t take any shit. That’s why at Showdown at the Swamp our match is gonna be a Street Fight.” Scott Hall throws a toothpick at the camera, and he and Kevin Nash exit the ring. This segment got an A.

Our main event is a match is Syxx vs Facade. Syxx starts off strong with a series of stiff kicks to the face and body. The match is pretty one sided with Syxx in control until Facade starts making a comeback, but Syxx shuts him down in a hurry. Syxx locks in the Buzzkill. Facade has no choice but to tap out. This match got a B.

Overall the show got a B+

FTW Showdown at the Swamp

FTW Showdown at the Swamp is sponsored by KFC’s Georgia Gold chicken. It’s WOO! CRISPY! WOO! TANGY!

We are live from the Municipal Stadium in front of a sold out 700 people. The show opens up with the camera pointed at a dimly lit commentary table with the silhouettes of two people. The lights turn on. “Hello everybody and for one night only we will be your commentary team. My name is Lance Catamaran, and I’m flanked by the ever punctual, ever sharp, ever coordinated Chett Chetterfield.” The camera pans over to Chett. “Thank you very much LC it’s always a pleasure to be here in Frantic Talks Wrestling. I’m excited for another night of action.” The camera zooms of and Lance starts talking, “Haha LC. I do like your nicknames. Without further adieu let’s send it down to the ring with our first match!” 

The first match is The Outsiders w/Syxx vs The Hardy Boys for the FTW Tag Team Championships. Both teams start to brawl wildly in the ring before all four competitors spill onto the outside. Scott Hall smacks Jeff in the face, and starts mocking him. On the other side Matt is taking a chair to Kevin Nash’s leg trying to chop the big man down. This match goes on very brutally for another 10 minutes before the find their way into the backstage area. They brawl all the way to outside on the street. Jeff Hardy gets Kevin Nash down by kicking him square in the dick, and then pulls open a manhole cover. Jeff picks Nash up by his hair, but Nash fights back. Ultimately Nash gets the upperhand, and forces Jeff Hardy through the opening. A loud splash is heard. Nash turns his attention to Matt. Hall and Nash double team Matt Hardy, and drag him across the street to the nearby ice cream parlor: Los Ice Creams. Hall throws Matt through the window, and Nash walks behind the counter and yells “Hey Matt, you want sprinkles on that?” Rooting around for a bit Nash finds a scoop, and scoops a bunch of sprinkles onto the ground. Hall hoists Matt up for the Outsider’s Edge, and drops him onto the sprinkle covered ground. Pinning him for the 1-2-3. Winners and STILL FTW Tag Team Champions. The Outsiders. This match got an A.

Next up we have the 3-on-1 handicap match featuring The Scythe (Undertaker, Crane and Rey Mysterio Jr.) vs Kenny Omega. All three members jump on Kenny Omega as soon as the bell rings, and beat the hell out of him. Kenny tries to make a comeback multiple times only to be shut down every single time. Every. Single. Time. Undertaker finally ends it by hitting Omega with the Tombstone Piledriver for the 1-2-3. After the match six hooded figures come out carrying a casket. They rolls Omega into and carry it out. This match got a B.

The main event of the evening is Johnny Gargano defending his title against Shinsuke Nakamura. Both competitors are in the ring, but before the bell can ring CEO Chris Raaber comes out mic in hand. “Gentleman, I know you’ve both had your differences, and want to tear each other apart. I have a better idea though. I’m going to put a third man into this match. Let me bring him out. Introducing… THE SEA CREATURE!!!!” The Sea Creature makes his way to the ring, and the match begins. It’s a very hard hitting match with stiff strikes all around. Nakamura gets his nose busted open, potentially broken. The Sea Creature clears the ring at one point being the only….thing (?) standing. He plays to the crowd a bit before Gargano comes back in and dropkicks him in the back of the head. Nakamura comes back in and hits Gargano with the Kinshasa. As he’s pinning him the Sea Creature gets back up and drops Nakamura with the Deep Sea Driver. Then pins him for the 1-2-3. Winner and NEW FTW Heavyweight Champion: The Sea Creature! This match got a B+

After the match The Sea Creature stands tall over the bodies of Gargano and Nakamura. He holds his fin out for a mic. *He raises the mic to his face, but pulls it away at the last second. He then reaches up with his other fin/hand, and pulls his mask off to reveal…Marty Scurll! He picks the mic up to his face again and says, “I’m baaaaack!” He then throws the mic down and the screen fades to black. This segment got an A.

Overall the show got an A-.

Well there you have it dear reader! Join us next time as we cover the month of January, and the pay-per-view FTW Time Crisis.

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